Do Christians Have Free Speech Today?

daisy-detail

 

I like to live life in the cracks, because that’s where the light comes in.

Leonard Cohen.

 

On this day in 2015, do we have more or less freedom to speak than 10 years ago, or even 2 years ago?  This Monday was Martin Luther King Day. Dr. King was a living example of the power of speech, particularly, the power and the right to use speech to protest injustices and inequality.

I can’t help but wonder if there is still freedom of speech when the thing spoken about happens to be religion. Do we still have the right to speak in protest of religious inequality or other practices? With Charlie Hedbo, we saw the dangers of freedom of speech about someone else’s religious beliefs. But, what about Christianity? Right here, today in America, a land that ridicules theocracies, do Christians really have free speech? Are Christians really allowed to speak honestly or even critically about their own religion without losing the moniker of “devout” or “faithful?”

The most common observation my non-Christian friends make about we Christians is that we don’t seem to practice tolerance or grace to each other or even like each other very much. Case in point: the YouTube uproar resulting from a Victoria Osteen sermon. A video clip from a sermon preached by Victoria Osteen seemingly saying, “ come to church for you and your own happiness” was played with a predictably vehement series of responses. She was called a heretic. I’m not surprised that some people vehemently disagreed with her. I even disagreed with some of what she was saying. But, what really caused me concern as a Christian was the vitriolic claims of heresy not because of what she said, but because she was a woman saying it. One YouTube commentator said she was a heretic because the Bible does not allow women to speak with authority over men. So, she was a heretic because she was a woman speaking in a church? 

Another case in point: Rob Bell. The Huffington Post recently ran a great article recounting what happened to him as a result of writing the best-selling book, Love Wins. It recounted how Mr. Bell fell from grace, lost his flock and had to completely re-invent himself after publishing the book. Fellow Christians labeled him a heretic. Heretic? Apparently, Christian commentators did not know what to label him; was he a Christian Universalist or something else? I’m wondering why that is important in a theology that stresses grace?

These two events happened before the cyber- attack pending the release of The Interview, and the subsequent attack on Charlie Hebdo. Where at first, I was concerned, now my blood is running cold.

 ~                                                                   ~

 I have a question or two. Do we find wonder, authenticity, or miracles in rigid dogma? I haven’t. I haven’t found compassion or tolerance resting there either. What about grace, the hallmark of Christianity? Doesn’t grace only occur when we fall short of the absolute rules and someone loves us, anyway? I have been unsuccessfully trying to be as perfect as Jesus all these years, and found these spiritual prizes in the cracks between the dicta, the dogma, the all or nothing commands.

When we decry any work or statement we don’t’ agree with as heresy, aren’t we limiting our own ability to speak out in the future?

Owe no one anything except to love each other, for the one who loves another has fulfilled the law. Romans 13:8

Just saying:)

6 SCANDALOUS PRACTICES I’M USING IN 2015

good fireworks

 1) Serenity first and foremost. There is nothing and no one on this earth worth sacrificing my own peace of mind. Getting myself in a mental muddle won’t help anyone or make the world any better. I will engage in any practice necessary to preserve my serenity, no matter how unusual or subversive, including the following:

 

2) Brazenness. I simply will not accept shame from anyone, including myself. Shame is a tactic, not a truth. I’m also going to refuse any guilt that I myself haven’t earned.

3) Keeping an open mind. As unlikely as it may seem, there may be a different point of view even from my most dug- in perceptions and beliefs.

As Voltaire said, I’m going to enjoy my ability to make up my own mind and let others enjoy the dignity of making up theirs. How could I ever hope to earn someone’s respect, if I don’t try to respect his or her thinking and beliefs?

Practicing # 3 will inevitably lead down the slippery slope ending in # 4.

4) I might have to utter the dreaded phrase, ” you might be right.”

5) I’m going to re- learn the now seemingly extinct practices of consensus and compromise, and ask myself, “how important is it?” before endeavoring to assist anyone to get back on the side of the Angels. Am I really sure I’m on the right side? A difference of opinion isn’t a personal attack. The more emotional I am about something, the more likely I am to have distorted perceptions, which may lead me away from the solution or resolution I seek.

6) In law school we learned the rule of reasonableness: what would a reasonable man or woman do in the same situation? It’s kind of bizarre that with all the lawyers roaming the earth, I never hear this word. I’m going to attempt to resuscitate this all but extinct practice, and use it as the criterion in my interactions, instead of my feelings and perceptions.

Who knows what will happen? I’ll keep you posted.

In your small way, you can shake the world.”

Gandhi

 

PEACE IS INTERSTELLAR

Hubble_deep_field

 

Each moment has its life and its death; otherwise, existence is impossible.

The Tao.

 

I saw the movie, Interstellar, last night in IMAX and I can’t stop thinking about it. It’s a Sunday morning, and I should be in church, but I am still thinking about this movie instead. I keep thinking about how so many seemingly random and unrelated things in this movie turn out to be inextricably intertwined and, in fact, dependent each upon the other. I keep thinking about the vast number of spiritual parallels to this theme.

The film is almost indescribable in its artistry and overlapping themes, but David Brooks of The New York Times writes a stunningly beautiful review of the movie entitled, Love and Gravity, that is, I think, a work of art in and of itself. In his review Mr. Brooks points to the movie pointing to this interconnection of seemingly mutually exclusive things: science and faith, and science and our love for each other. In fact, they are intertwined, and faith and love become their own field and dimension.

And so it is, I think, with Peace. It can be a super- power, but it is dependent upon and intertwined with so many other things. Like the movie, it is dependent on our attraction to and seeking out of something or someone out there we cannot see, who spans time and space, generations, life and death—a God who is invisible but is still reaching across time and space to be with us. It is impossible to connect with him if we don’t extend ourselves to meet him. That is the cosmic, fun side.

There is also the mundane side of peace– muscle memory. Peace is a practice.

I suffered a brain injury as a result of a car accident about two years ago. I am now ok. Before the accident, I was a fairly accomplished pianist and was in a band singing and learning the guitar. I lost my memory of how to play these instruments. Because I lost the intellectual memory to process these things, I didn’t even try. Because I didn’t even try, I lost the muscle memory. When my intellectual memory of the chords and notes returned, my hands and my voice would not respond to the commands. Once I just started moving my fingers it was terrible at first, but within a couple of weeks, the music began to sound like something a human being would want to hear. I played a tape of a friend singing to teach myself to sing again. I thought that regaining command of my instruments was dependent on my mind but it was dependent on my love for them and their need to be played.

Peace is like this. If I wait for it to just happen to me, I won’t experience it. To have peace I have to surrender to the partnership with my unseen creator, and for that to happen, I have to practice being mindful that there is a partnership It is dependent on my love for my creator, his love for me and my ability to practice this, if only for a few moments a day. Peace, and the lack of it, is related to control, powerlessness and fear, but especially self worth and humility.

I can’t have peace if I am afraid of the future, regret the past, or don’t approve of myself. I can’t get rid of these afflictions unless I practice peace. I can’t cure my mind and it’s ridiculous thought patterns with my mind. Back to the partnership and the eternal dance.

FEAR, LIES AND TENDERNESS

 

Our lives begin to end the day we become silent about things that matter.

Martin Luther King Jr.

quail on ground

 

Fear’s relentless tentacles have been perhaps the most formidable force in my life: for good and for evil. Fear has given me amazing gifts and it has caused me to sabotage myself unmercifully. It has taught and given me probably more than any other thing. It has given me the opportunity to beg for and receive miracles. It’s also given me the gifts of seeing a lie for what it is and being tender with others and myself. Right now, I’m virtually eaten up by fear.

As October approaches, I always find myself more in the grip of those tentacles. My grandmother’s birthday was in October. She died a couple of years ago, but this time of year it feels like I’ve just lost her again and sends me into this monolithic fear of “ What or who that is precious to me will I lose next?”

Right now, at this moment, on this gorgeous fall morning, these are the things I am terrified of:

*Fear of REJECTION even by people I would and should reject, or people I don’t even know

*Fear of loss of a single person close to me, because I perceive those who appreciate me as an endangered species.

*Fear of the Headlines

*Fear of never –ending war

*Fears for my children’s safety and happiness in a progressively more chaotic world

*Fear of my parents losing their independence

*Fear I won’t be up to the task that God has put in front of me or that I won’t know what it is

*Fear of failure

*Fear Of Success

*Fear of someone saying, “Oh you’re the one who wrote that book I hate!”

*Fear of my To Do list- that it might one day come out the victor in a battle for survival

*Fear of my crows’ feet

*Fear of being single

*Fear of being married

*Inexplicable fear of cheerleaders and Arbonne saleswomen

 

Each and every fear is shrink- wrapped in a lie. The wrap itself is elegant and beautiful. The lie is often more palatable than the truth, because it requires much less effort and offers the illusion of safety.

At the root of all of these fears are different tentacles of the same lie:

“I am in this world alone. I have to carry it all myself. There is no one out there as bad/ messed up/ crazy/ fill in the blank/ as me. I can’t communicate honestly what is important to me or I will drive them away. There is no one up there listening.”

Here’s a doozy of a lie I am half- believing right now. I’m sitting here fighting a lie floating around in my head that says, for all of my time spiritual seeking and asking God to remove my fears, I shouldn’t have them any more. Here’s another lie: How can I minister to and help those hurt by their religion and seeking to regain their spirituality, if I don’t 100 percent have it all together? I shouldn’t have any fears. This is the aforementioned “ I have to carry it all alone” lie.

If I believe this lie, I become nothing but a goalie. Every communication and action I take is from a defensive posture.

Self- defense and justification make my message disappear. I have to ward off real or imaginary attacks to my credibility or right to belong instead of reaching out or just reaching others. If I listen too my fears and let them drive my communications with others, I’m intimidated by everyone. That’s no way to love someone, help someone or minister to anyone.

Fear has taught me not to be the goalie.

~

Of course, the remedy to fear is trust. Fear, lies and trust are all inextricably intertwined in every situation. Every fear is an opportunity to trust myself, trust others and trust the One who made us, or trust the lie. That sounds hackneyed and trite because it is NOT that simple. We can’t berate or will ourselves into trusting. The only way we can ease ourselves into trust of an uncertain future, others, ourselves and God is tenderness.

~

When I was around 9, my grandparents took my brother and I to Hawaii. We stayed on Maui and went to every beach there. The waves were huge and not like anything we had ever seen on our Texas coast. My grandmother, who must have been around 55 years old at the time, plunged into the waves with each of us in hand and proceeded to teach us how to body -surf. She taught us courage and joy in the face of fear without ever saying a word.

I was recently on the Texas coast by myself for a time of prayer and getting my head together.

Every day, I went body surfing for several hours and I felt my grandmother with me every single time. Needless to say, I felt God with me every single time too.

Each time I approached the waves (there had been a storm, so there actually were some) I didn’t know how it would turn out. I had to assume that someone or something would carry me. I was out there by myself, so there really was no alternative, and every time, I was tenderly and warmly carried.

Trust and tenderness are like that for me. I don’t have to chart a course; it won’t work anyway. I need to be tender with my fears and myself while I ask for courage and gradually see the lies for what they are.

I have finally figured out, God is not going to remove all of my fears, so I have stopped berating myself for not being perfect and I have finally figured out that is the biggest gift of all. God is tenderly helping me teach myself trust through the gift of answered prayers, and by showing me that I am not separate or alone.

I have a tribe of people hand- picked by God who like me and are there for me. We all have a tribe and our tribe is bigger than we think.

Without fear, I have no opportunity to experience the grace of God’s protection and many answered prayers. I would not have the opportunity to develop my strength in facing unbelievable odds. I would not have been forced to seek my higher power, fall to my knees and yell, ” HELP! I don’t know what I’m doing here!” and received more confirmations than I can count that

 Someone is listening up there, and he’s saying,

It’s on its way, open your hands! Yes, I’m listening. Do you trust me now?

 

Totally worth it.

God is our refuge and our strength, a very present help in trouble. Therefor we will not fear…

Be still and know that I am God…The Lord of Hosts is with us.

Psalm 46

 

 

SEX

 

negligee on bedSex and Why?

This is one of those posts that you are afraid to write. I’m afraid of writing it, because I ‘m doing a dangerous thing:asking questions about sex and religion. There is no snark or controversy- courting here.

Sometimes I have answers, but this time I have nothing but questions to which I am sincerely seeking enlightenment. These questions about religion and sex have troubled me for as along as I can remember. There seems to be a disconnect.

Here we go. Ready?

 

WHY is sex treated as equivalent to spiritual death in so many religious interpretations?

Why is whom you love or when you love seemingly worse than whom you kill, envy, steal from or even destroy with lies and gossip? Why is the simple fact that some love at all a subject of judgment or controversy on a par with high treason?

If having sex in some situations is a sin, why do so many treat it like the absolute worse one, one punishable by death or, at least, leprosy?? Based upon what?

Why is there a hierarchy of sins at all, other than the Ten Commandments?

The Bible tells us to not fear more times than it tells us to not have sex. Isn’t it in fact, fear that leads to all the other sins? Envy, fear of not having enough or as much as the next guy, fear that he will take it away, hatred of those who are different and wars to stop them or protect ourselves from them arise from that fear. Has sex ever started a war?

Why do beautiful, healthy women with God-given sensuality dress like 1950s librarians in church or when they are with religious people? Are they afraid that someone will think that they are having sex or might want to in the future? Didn’t God give them the sensuality, the beauty and the ability to fully experience them both? Who encourages these 1950s librarians to attempt to disguise or outright kill this God- given part of themselves? Why do some Christian women feel and bow to the need to Dowdy Down?

Is it sex that we fear? Should we? It is undoubtedly powerful and sometimes not in a good way, but will attempts to ward it off like wearing garlic around one’s neck to repel a Vampire really work?

This phenomenon has always disturbed and frightened me, as a teenager, as young adult and now, as a woman married with a daughter. I don’t want her to feel like she can’t fully be her beautiful self.

 

Why do descriptions of the Proverbs woman sound like something I could never reach? Why do I secretly never want to reach that standard? I haven’t threshed much wheat, or sewn my own clothes on a loom lately. I can’t help but notice that she sounds more like a beast of burden than beautiful, healthy vibrant healthy radiant advertisement for a loving creator.  But, maybe it’s just me.

 

There was a conference I attended some time ago that echoed an author’s message of “Fear the Cage!” Amen. Isn’t the message of hiding or denigrating one’s sexuality in any way just like putting a beautiful songbird in a cage?Love_birds_in_cage

 

We delight in the beauty of the butterfly, but rarely admit the changes it has gone through to achieve that beauty” – Maya Angelou

Image by Ks. mini

 

If anyone has any answers, I’d love your thoughts.

 

 

A DAY IN THE LIFE OF A SPIRITUAL AUTHOR/ A LIGHT- HEARTED VIEW

A LIGHT- HEARTED LOOK AT A HEAVY SUBJECT

 

 

Do what you can, with what you have, where you are.

Theodore Roosevelt

7;30am

1)

“What if I will never be the next Nostradamus?

What if my ‘aha moment’ isn’t going to happen today?

What if I have nothing life- changing to contribute?

What if I totally miss predicting the impending apocalypse?

What if what I am inspired to say angers or offends:

The Religious Right/ Left/ Centrists

Baptists

Catholics

Jews

Universalists

Atheists

Zen Buddhists

Muslims

My family?”

 

“What if I inadvertently leave a group out? “

“What if one group thinks I am writing about them, when I’m not?”

 

“What if people come to my house with pitchforks and blazing torches, like the scene from Frankenstein?”

“What if no one says or does anything, because they don’t care or simply do not know that I exist? “

“Can I do what I feel called to do if no one knows I am there?”

 

Have existential meltdown. If a tree falls in the forest and no one hears it…

 

 

2) GET OUT OF BED.

 

3) Beg/ bargain with God about all aspects of number one.

 

 

4) Drink coffee for inspiration.

 

blankcomputerondesk5) Wait for mountaintop experience to write about.

 

6) Go to job that supports writing habit, enjoying the peace that accompanies actual completion of tasks. While working, have hundreds of inspiring writing ideas, just nothing relevant to this particular writing deadline. Forget most of them before writing them down. Write down the remainder on To Do list stretching until the year 2050.

 

 

7) Resort to exercise or a nap to clear the mental pathways.

 

 

 

8) Receive desired inspiration/ word from God while engaged in inconvenient activities such as showering, using the other part of the bathroom, or pretending to pay attention in the middle of a conversation.

 

latepm9) Let the words out.

10) Thank God for doing the real work.

 

11) Collapse in heap.

 

The ability to simplify means to eliminate the unnecessary so that the necessary may speak.

Hans Hofmann

A LONG OVERDUE LOVE LETTER TO MY/ THE CHURCH

(OR: 7 Must- Haves in a Great Church)

 

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Not what you expected from me, right? But, It’s SHOCK AND AWE time. It’s time for a radical departure from lusty commentary on what bewilders, angers and scares the spit out of me about religion, because there are brilliant and beckoning things about the church I have personally encountered in my flight from the Old Testament, its punishing God, and its churchly reflections.

During my spiritual road trip, I found many formidable beacons of hope. I found many instances of a benevolent God with skin on and institutionalized Grace.

These 7 characteristics make a good checklist, if one is looking for a community of faith.

These traits made my spiritual exile and return all the more worthwhile, because I came back with a list of spiritual personality traits that were the perfect match for me. (Online dating metaphor- more SHOCK AND AWE)

This is written in the first person, because each and every one of these gifts has been such a personal blessing for which I am deeply grateful. This is a heartfelt thank you. You all know who you are.

Does this sound like your church?

 

1) Thank you for seeing the artist in me, loving her, and pulling her out of the safe and anonymous shadows. I got to see myself through God’s eyes, by seeing myself through yours. You showed me that I could write, speak and sing, and that people would actually listen! You taught me to fight my fear of embarrassment or humiliation and see the other side. You taught me that silent is not necessarily safe.

You set me on my path, planted my feet upon it, and then gave me a loving shove by giving me opportunity and then daring me to take it.

I got to recite my poetry  for first 10s and then thousands to see. I got to recite it to music! I got to be relevant and even hip, for a moment. You told me I wasn’t too old, young, talentless, (fill in the blank here) to publish.

 

2) Thank you for being a hospital, not a country club. Only broken, hurting, authentic people find it comfortable here. This means that everyone, absolutely every person who would describe themselves as hurt or broken in some way, is included and welcomed warmly, including me. Thank you for sending the perfect people elsewhere. They are so boring.

 

3) This is personal to my current church: I adore you because you have fought for and maintained a choir. I’m not even in the choir, but I love what this means! It is an acknowledgement that each and every one of us is a Worship Leader, each in our unique way, and the union and blend of these disparate parts is the body of Christ.

 

4) Thank you to the pastor, his family and the staff for being unapologetically real, broken people. This makes me not just respect you, but love you and I will be even more attentive to the things you say and the lessons you can teach. You are always careful not to say or do inappropriate things, but you are not actively managing your image.

 

5) Thank you for not being too big to know me or too small to hold me or my ideas and questions. You are family, not a city. Although I do not cut a large leadership swath through the congregation, and the frequency of my church attendance approximates that of solar flares or meteor showers, everyone knows me, including all church staff. Everyone knows I’m out trying to do my thing- no guilt. My emails are answered. I cannot overstate what these small recognitions of my personhood and worthiness have meant to my spiritual healing and development.

 

secondblogpic6) Thank you for being a sanctuary in the true definition of the word. We are safe to temporarily remove our armor and reveal ourselves here.

We all need to find and cultivate our “people”: those who want and accept the truth from us, no matter what. They do this because they want us to continue to grow and evolve. These people can be anywhere, but a good church should have this general characteristic. Growth is messy and judgment is counterproductive.

 

7) Thank you for being substance over form. This is what I like about you and what I like about Pope Frank. You encourage a dialogue and an open discussion about what we believe and why we believe it. True Grace over Churchiness.

 

Images supplied by L E Kinzie. All rights reserved.

 

 

 

 

(book excerpt) One Thing that is Always Sacred

angelarms

What is it?

Every Thing.

Allow me to explain:

If God made you and I the way we are, with character defects that sometimes cause us to stumble and fall, does he hate those imperfect parts of us?

Does God hate anyone simply because they are imperfect and may do crazy or maybe even ” bad” things? Some are saying yes very loudly.

I say no- emphatically, undeniably, categorically no.

 

My spiritual growth, healing and maturity flow from my ability to see the context of each individual’s life and how it makes their walk and experience unique and even sacred. Without understanding the “why”, it is impossible to know the heart of a person and see them or God in them.

If God is infinite, then there must be an infinite number of ways to mirror him, and there must be an infinite number ways to find him, follow him and find one’s true path-  all unique, all sacred.

Without the key ingredient of ” why” I can only categorize people in pre- fab boxes, judge them and cast them out…

If God created us to be totally unique… then none of us is ugly, and our behavior can’t be judged as ugly until the full context is revealed

I am not saying there is no evil, there is.

But, if my character defects cause me to humbly hit my knees and ask God for help in overcoming them, are they something to be hated? Does God hate them? How could he? Does God hate people he made for being the way he made them? How could he?

Surely God knows I am going to screw up before I do. It may grieve him to see me stumble, but does he hate me for it? I can’t believe that. Then why should people hate what God does not? Aren’t mistakes and detours essential to spiritual growth?

 

How can we know or judge where someone is going if we do not care where he or she is coming from?

 

?

If wandering in the desert for decades led me to a God beyond my wildest dreams, a new me, and a life replete with miracles, then was that time in the desert, wrong or a mistake? Was it wasted time? Nope. Is it for anyone else to say? Nope. It was Sacred. The pain and fear I felt every day of that lengthy detour, led me face the fraudulent me in the mirror and the fraudulent God I had inherited and fire them both.